Tag Archives: humor

Fake football support

Dear Arsenal Football Club,

My name is Billy Costigan and I am a fake football supporter.

The fake football team I support is Arsenal, and I have also used Real Madrid and Aston Villa in th past too.

I have been fake supporting Arsenal for the past 10 years and this is my official resignation.

Now don’t get me wrong, I do love the way you play the game. I love the way you kick the ball, with such passion, such power, such promise and pizazz.

Soccer boot

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Cotton buds, the truth!

I don’t want to alarm you, but 7000 PEOPLE were hospitalised by cotton buds (Q-tips) last year and this epidemic could be coming to a town near you soon. There’s no need to over react but we all need to know how to stop one of these innocuous looking instruments from destroying our lives. More people spent time in hospital due to cotton bud injuries than razor blade injuries last year and this is adding to the already debt ridden NHS crisis.

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12 Years a Slave & Django Unchained Oscar winners

12 Years a Slave & Django Unchained are Oscar winners, but which did you prefer?

I preferred Django Unchained to 12 years a slave, no contest. I’m one of those people who doesn’t think many films made in Hollywood deserve much intellectual merit. The depiction of slavery was accurate yes, and I’ve read enough about slavery to grasp that. Roots, Confessions of Nat Turner, and Beloved are all good reads. But to hear Nigger…this and Nigger that, watch horrid torturous scenes, seeing little black children treated like animals, (and once again), black women raped was demoralising. I kept imagining it was me getting whipped, beaten, shackled and spat on and it was a surreal feeling. Thanks Steve McQueen, your doing a wonderful job representing your own race.

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