Blistering heat, well prepared, the group & me in the middle of the forest, next to the horses and surrounded by dogs. The old man, I thought I’d seen before. The experience felt déjà vu ish, but it was light this time. One liquid and four dustings. The cottage was three hundred years old attached to a larger property set in the middle of the woods in Bury. There were other houses, but the nearest was about a mile away. Where we stayed was separated from the adjoining house by trees and bushes, with its own nightlighted entrance gave us the true feeling of seclusion. Peaceful, tranquil, music prepared and obviously a fast, except for a few strawberries. Never before have I experienced this feeling in the intense heat for so long, and I was set up underneath a tree lying down for the whole trip. It hit me after fifteen with not many visuals. I noticed that when you do it outside like this it’s no longer contained, the energy runs through the blades of grass, on the wings of the flies and the horns of the crickets. Annoying fucking flies. I tried to be one and still, present and allow the bugs to climb aboard, but they tickled my skin. It got hotter as the sun slid across the sky, and the trip became a little more intense.
Energy now moving up through the flowing tree bark and into the tree branches and leaves, which moved, synchronised in motion with the wind. It looked rehearsed, as if the trees had been practising behind the stage for hours before the final performance. I was looking at something I’d seen thousands of times before, trees, but noticed how the collective moves for the first. Then hubey’s came over and licked my face. I was with cuz for a bit, both of us just sitting there. These moments are important and even though not a lot was said, I felt bonded. When I was by myself I cried, and it was difficult. It felt like I had the whole world on my shoulders but it passed. You gain strength from moving through these moments in thought and maintaining composure. I always yawn before I cry, but I felt nothing much inside. I wasn’t hugely upset. Maybe they were tears of release, tears of acceptance, tears of rejoice. Everything was beautiful, and this time, everything around me being in nature, was actually beautiful, it was a truly enchanting experience. When the gang came to me, I felt like I had a support system to get me through the crying. Tapping into the deeper parts of my mind I saw the rainbow layers of emotion which we have in between us as people. Me, Mz, Cuz and Cam, Hubeys and Riiiiiiiiooooo, lying outside in the heat, in the middle of the forest, minds wandering, laughing and crying but I always get shown that there will be tough times ahead but it’s always worth it.
Sometimes, I feel like these experiences are mentally preparing me for something. I don’t know if it’s death, but it could be. It definitely evokes a string of sadness when I think about it, again tapping into a feeling inside which I have never been able to reach without the help. Cam cried, like me she didn’t know why, which she battled with. When I was crying I locked eyes with hubeys and then she came flying over from the other side of the garden to greet me and lick my face. Cuz got me an icepop, walking like a robot. Lacking energy in all of us because our minds were pumping out electro-signals, to the newly surfaced neurons in our brains. Mind throbbing with pleasure, accessing a different plain of information, inside myself. The real me. Whoever that is this is a sure fire way to find out, the music played out, Bohemian Rapsody, Tom Walker, Sativa & Naaaaaavajo! There she was. Pay up. Some interesting additions of Alan Watts, the set wasn’t perfect but the little blue speaker performed beyond my expectations. Guitars, Guitars Guitars, and as Natural Mystic played, we all looked on in the same direction at the trees set about amongst the vast lands we were becoming fixtures of. Cuz was an old Indian man with a goat on the hills of Jamaica he said, and I saw it too. You get to see age with these trips, deep in the soul. Even saw the soul of hubeys, vibrant, loving dog, with magic in her eyes. We’d gone on a walk in the morning to get the blood pumping and this was the ultimate way to wind down. It felt like the closing scenes of a movie. Then hubey’s came and licked my face again!
Continued laughter as we talked about humanity and beyond the evening ran on through BBQ’d chicken, elderflower sparking juice and garnished with a stunning sunset. For the most part, I didn’t really have the super trippy feeling I usually get. I flirted with the concept of consciousness and definitely didn’t do any intergalactic travelling. Appreciation was cemented, for the people I was with, the surroundings and the fact that I was able, just about, but able to help create this experience, for myself and the people around me. Family. That’s what we are to each other and these experiences are important for creating those soul bonds. When I talk about it, people don’t really get it. The way I experience these things seems to be different to other people, and usually it’s because I’m jumping in a bit deeper too. They go food shopping for lunch that day and I splash out on a months worth. Different strokes I guess but I do hope they lose the ear. It’s fear which stops people from getting the most out of these experiences and it’s important to challenge yourself. Riding the waves of spirituality can be overwhelming but it has shown me about myself and reiterated the importance of maintaining the journey of self actualisation. That might sound wishy washy, but resetting your mind this way is a nice break and purposeful contrast with the day to day driving working, eating bullshit we do . Being outside is the only way to do it. Honey I shrunk the kids shit, most definitely, but again the energy gets let loose and covers your perception with a blanket of geometric art canvassed on emotion and the feeling o being truly alive. One of the best yet. More required. Hubey’s.